MMILF (musician man I‘d like to fuck)
Julian Casablancas
who he is: Lead singer of The Strokes
why he could totally get it: There is absolutely a certain je ne sais quoi about this guy. It’s not the kind of attractive that gets my panties flung, but there is something there I can’t put into words. His style is a huge part of it. I also must mention he sometimes go through gross phases where he doesn’t do it at all for me. But mostly, yes
As much as I want to endlessly rant about the genius of Erykah Badu, I will instead say this:
it is so fucking fitting this woman is a Doula and now Midwife. If there’s one thing she excels in, it’s giving birth to beauty.
The tagline of this blog includes “beyond Madge”, I am aware. But this is a music gallery geared towards gay men, and she can’t be avoided. Look, when you think of “gay music”, Madonna is obviously going to spring to mind. So we all need to get past it and focus on one thing: Madonna is capable of releasing really enjoyable albums.
Many Madonna enthusiasts (of which I am not, let’s just air that out now) have made the argument that “Ray Of Light” was her Sistine Chapel, and I would say it’s a fair statement. And while I enjoyed “Ray Of Light” a great deal, I think “Confessions on a Dancefloor” is just as well-orchestrated if for one simple reason: it was Madonna’s last hurrah.
Prior to COADF, she had dropped “American Life” - nobody’s 2-decent-track favorite. The music had no bearing in what was happening. And for an artist that was always in the midst of what’s happening, that was like… double sad. I don’t know if she learned from that flop, or if she decided to just change our perceptions rather than fitting into them, but COADF was seemingly exactly what everyone needed when it happened.
In a word: it made club music enjoyable and interesting again. And the album itself is just damn strong all around. From the mood, to the cover art, to how it was promoted… oh and the songs are pretty fun too. The very first Madonna album where I was not skipping tracks after the first few listens.
By today’s standards, the dance songs on COADF seem to fall flat. It’s evolved into an “easy listening” dance album.
I just wish she had stopped there. “Hard Candy” produced so much second hand embarrassment, that it made me appreciate COADF that much more. How could the same artist re-launch a sub-genre… and then play “catch up” with the same genre, one album later? Seriously, 4 minutes to save the world? I can’t even get myself started.
When Madonna isn’t trying to be a rock-star, belting out ballads, acting, or altogether veering away from her strengths, then she is tolerable. The bitch just needs to stick with what she does best: make music that we can get ready/work out/dance to, and stir a bit of nonsense controversy in the process in order to call yourself an ‘artist’. Everything else is annoying.
In this way, COADF was her last moment to be super-relevant. It’s all been downhill since so, savor this one for what it was.
MMILF (musician man I‘d like to fuck)
Howlin’ Pelle Almqvist
who he is: Lead singer/Frontman of “The Hives”
why he could totally get it: Always dressed to the nines (something which adds to the overall allure of he band) and a cute face to match. But mostly his stage presence - arrogance in a way that makes you smirk, not groan - is what does it for me. His voice is sometimes a little too sexual to handle, and on more than one occasion, made me clutch my pearls in alarm.
When he says “check it” on ‘tick tick boom’ = panties flung
While you wait for “AFK” (a documentary about The Pirate Bay) to be finished, watch “Good Copy, Bad Copy” - a documentary about the current state of copyright and culture
It’s good. Probably my favorite part is when they explore new business models, that would allow the music industry to continue to make the same over-the-country revenue they were, and for the consumer to be able to download music at their leisure… without a crapload of lawsuits.
In fact, the prison sentences for the founders of The Pirate Bay were announced. Months in prison for sharing information? What in the actual fuck. As Peter Sunde remarks:
“All of the people involved in TPB at some time have been involved in everything from famous leaks projects to aiding people in the arab spring. We’ve fought corruption all over the world. We’ve promoted equal opportunities to poor nations around the globe. We’ve crushed the monopoly on information. Our close ones, many who have helped building TPB, have been mentioned as possible winners of the nobel peace prize.”
A lot of it has to do with the Swedish government being under pressure from the American one - but I’ll save that rant for another time…. I WILL note that The Swedish government really has no NEED to pander to the American government, and leave it at that.
If remixing culutre, the state of intellectual property, and filesharing is of any interest you, watch this doc. Actually, watch it anyways.
You can see the full documentary online for free HERE
What I’m listening to is always reflective of my mood. I am a SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE in that manner. I promise I listen to upbeat stuff, just not lately. Oh, life. Oh, hope.
I want it to be summer. I want a change of scenery. I want ridiculous conversation at 3am outside. I want wine-induced laughter. I want whatever is new and makes me smile.
I want to say all this stuff without sounding like a total pantload.
How hedonistic of me.
In any case, this song pretty much encompasses the yearning I’m feeling right now. I don’t know the lyrics, so this song is probably not even about anything close to what I’m feeling - but the mood is there. I can’t help but think this is exactly the kind of song that ends up on American Eagle’s playlist to help them market some new sandy wash jean. But give it a listen.
The first time I watched “500 Days of Summer”, I was an emotional mess.
Bravo, an honest “love” story. Bravo, you made me cry. Bravo, my romantic life is on the big screen somehow! Bravo, what fucking song is this?
I cannot watch this movie without being hit with a wave of nostalgia. Myself and a close friend of mine were going through what the protagonist was, pretty much verbatim (not with each other. Different ‘romances’).
My friend and I have since lost touch, which is a shame - but that’s a whole other can of words. This move reminds me of him, which just adds a whole other layer of nostalgic bullshit. I am trying to watch a movie, here!
One part of “500 Days of Summer” that will forever slash it’s way through my heart, is the scene where the screen is split in two: one labeled “expectations” and the other “reality” and you can clearly see the difference between the two.
It hit a little too close to home. How could I not relate? That split screen is my damn life. I felt a little violated. Someone took something so personal, and put it on film. Without my consent. And no, he wasn’t Zooey Deschanel, but he was a doe-eyed weirdo that is “still my best friend”.
The soundtrack of this violation was “Hero” by Regina Spektor. It took a year to get myself to listen to this song (I’m aware of how whiny/weak that sounds. Your heart broke too at some point so shut the hell up).
Back on topic: the song choice for that moment of life, was an excellent one.
This is the song you drink to while pining over someone. This is the song that plays when you see someone you love being kissed by a stranger. This is the song that’s going when you cry on the kitchen floor. This is a song you listen to while killing yourself.
I meant all those descriptives as compliments.
It’s all right.
Before Lauryn Hill was an orange-afro’d, unapologetically late, fit-having, tantrum-throwing diva (a diva that’s always just trying to be “real” with everybody), she was a musician. After about two years of commercial success, Hill dropped off the face of the earth. Apparently the western machine was wrecking her life and, I don’t know, it was tearing up her realness and philosophy, faster than weave tracks at ghetto catfight (oh I’m going to get shit on for that analogy at some point, I bet).
Today, she is still making the exact same claims. I’m not entirely sure who or what is preventing her from being herself. It certainly is not her fans, the western machine is too busy with Gaga and trying to convince us that Madonna is still so hip, and she doesn’t have a record to promote. It comes across as whining and makes me want someone to step in, tell her to shut up, and make another album. The world needs it.
But the sad reality is - and it’s something I’ve had to force myself to accept - she won’t ever be what she used to be. And what she used to be was terrific. The voice is no longer there. The music isn’t being made or consumed. The whole ordeal is fairly sad.
“The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill” is good for you. It’s good for your soul, good for your mood, good for your brain, good for breaking up, good for making love, good for driving to, the list goes on. If you don’t already have this album, or aren’t aware of it, you most likely were too young when it happened, to appreciate it.
I don’t think breaking up albums track-by-track is beneficial to anyone. Certainly not an album such as this, that actually functions as one unified piece. Also, my emotional reaction to certain music is interesting to no one but me. But I will say this…
This album was commercially successful for very specific reasons, and those reasons have never faded. After a decade, her voice can still make you shiver, the lyrics are still relevant. And the first 2 seconds (literally) of “ex-factor” will sledgehammer you into submission.
Let The Miseducation teach you.
